The Great Alignment Debate

In my current campaign we had a thief with sticky fingers. This, in itself, is not a terrible problem. While I generally frown on inter-party conflict, a thief that steals from the party, yet hands over his ill gotten gain with a chuckle and a shrug can be great for a laugh. (Think Tasselhoff).
The Chaotic Good thief in our campaign wasn’t such a genial fellow however. When confronted about gems going missing from the party pile, he drew his blade and proclaimed that if anyone thought that he was a thief, then they could eat some rapier. It was at this point that I put my head into my hands, because I knew a huge argument was about to ensue.
The Chaotic Good thief was clearly acting in a very Chaotic Evil manner.
Whenever alignment is discussed in DnD, the phrase "Alignment is a guide, not a straitjacket." pops up over and over again. That’s because notions of good and evil vary between person and person, and across cultures. While we all know the basic difference between good and evil (killing innocents is bad, very bad), the edges between the two are fuzzy and gray. Now, that’s great for all of the philosophers, because it keeps them in a job, but it can make DnD a nightmare. Just flip through the third edition DMG, and you’ll find rules for running, jumping, fighting, breaking down doors, and a thousand other things, because clearly defined rules make for easier DM’ing.
But Wizards of the Coast will never be able to write rules to let you know if a Lawful Good merchant will always charge a fair price; or if Lawful Evil mage is incapable of compassion, empathy, or love; or if a Good character that commits an evil act is still good.
This is where wisdom comes in, and hopefully this website dedicated to the Great Alignment Debate, will help you out.
One of the things that I have always loved about DnD alignment stuff is that unlike most sci-fi / fantasy / horror fiction, there is more than one dimension to ethical behavior. In addition to the classic Good vs. Evil, there is another axis of Chaos vs. Law. It is a combination of these two dimensions that give us our nine alignments.
I am going to do my best to examine and explain both the continuum of Good and Evil, and Law and Chaos, and also the interaction between the two. I will also attempt to answer your alignment questions as to the best of my ability. Remember though, I am only sketching out the concepts, to give you, the DM, more flexibility in making alignment judgments.
All of this still may be terribly entertaining, at least I hope it is, but it still doesn’t tell you if Jimmy Two-Fingers was being Lawful or Chaotic when he stole that gem from the King, or if your PC’s were being Good or Evil when they killed that entire Goblin Tribe they ran across in the wilderness. I shall attempt to help. Email me at alignmentjudge@yahoo.com and I will answer your alignment questions to the best of my abilities.
Finally, some of you are going to read my definition of
Good, Evil, Neutrality, Chaos, and Law, as well as my explanations of the nine alignments and think "This guy is full of it." Well, if you do think this, please email me (alignmentjudge@yahoo.com) and clearly explain why, exactly, you think that I am full of it, and I’ll try to respond. Different viewpoints will only help.
And that thief in my campaign? I ended up having to toss him out before the other players lynched him.